Working in a devotional way with the Muses is a form of soul retrieval and alchemy for me.
The more powerful the Muse (the more visceral and multi-layered aka the more obsessed I am), the more of me she requires to awaken and birth the vision. Which sometimes translates to an intense and ego shattering journey to reunite with the aspects of self who weren’t yet integrated for her arrival.
Every large creative undertaken I’ve thrown myself whole heartedly into has destroyed ‘me’ in the best possible way. With every creation all the way birthed, I’ve experienced a certain kind of annihilation of self in order to free and heal aspects of myself which were frozen in time, fragmented from trauma, or underdeveloped from insecurity and neglect.
While the miracle and grace of inspiration summons me into devotion and invokes my resolve to somehow keep moving the thing forward, often it’s simultaneously quite the psychedelic ass pummeling. Disillusionment occurs, clearing space for a new version to arise from the churning of it all. And ultimately there is somehow an increasing wellness and inner stability that transpires as a result of going through these initiations with the Muse.
Transformation is inevitable.
Sapphire might be the most true and full spectrum creative endeavor I’ve experienced of this nature, especially when it comes to the reunion of inner and outer spheres of Muse as aspects of embodied self.
I thought I was going to be telling a story from my future self of an Ecstatic Grief and a magical time traveling song capsule, where I was reunited with some deep mystical code of eternal remembrance of love to be freed up from the haunting of the grief of ages and distortion of power.
What actually happened was a process of being tested at every psychic and subconscious obstacle I have to experiencing spirit fully embodied as truth and presence, which denies no part of my humanity.
I pray to keep being called to the altar of the Muse, no matter how many little deaths it takes to fully realize how amazing it is to be alive.